Sorry for being on hiatus for the past two months everyone! Been busy but not that busy…so no real good excuse. But needless to say, I am back on wordpress! Yes, still reppin’ the single lifestyle in lovely Manhattan.
Swiping through tinder last night when I came across this young man who seemed very proud of his buttocks…It was literally booty booty BOOTY everywhere!!!
Have not had much time to write recently because work has been picking up and I AM SWAMPED! Had this ridiculous conversation with a Kim Jong Un troll on Tinder a few months ago. I swear, you meet all sorts of people on Tinder…but to be fair, I still insist on the fact that I have met some really nice and high quality guys on that app!
Here’s my 3 minute convo with the Supreme Leader…
Continued from Poof! Gone. PART I
“What are you doing Sunday? Would you like to go see Brooklyn?” It was a text from Philip.
I was so touched by his gesture because I have been blabbing about how much I wanted to see Brooklyn, the movie, during our text conversations for the past few days and he was thoughtful enough to ask me to go see it together. He was definitely earning points exponentially in my book.
And just when I was thinking about how sweet he was, he surprised me even more.
“Do you like salmon? I was thinking of cooking us dinner before we head over to see the movie,” he continued.
Um what? Not only is he taking me to a movie that I’ve been wanting to see for awhile now but he is also cooking for me?! What a sweet guy! I was very much looking forward to our date on Sunday.
The disappearing act that guys pull—and of course girls do too (I am guilty of such acts myself…) is not news flash to anyone. But the way that Philip executed his disappearing act was quite unique. Because he literally left me hanging in the middle of a conversation. Never to be heard from again.
Philip and I went out to a fun low-key bar in Soho for our first date. He was a lot more nerdy, in a good way, than I anticipated. And of course it helped that he was also a lot taller and much more handsome than I expected as well. We had so much fun nerding out about Harry Potter that the date ended up being 3 hours and I downed 4 tall glasses of beer, which, by the way, is a record for me. We were having such a good time just talking that we literally talked until the bar closed and the bartender kicked us out.
There was a period of about 6 months or so where I was somehow very keen on the idea of dating guys who are younger than me. So when you are in the smack middle of your twenties, that obviously meant the pool of candidates are recent college graduates. Patrick was one of those few recent college graduates that I dated. Well—I can’t really say dated, more like I went out on a date with. Patrick was 23.
“Ever since moving to New York, I’ve been more health conscious,” I chirped. Patrick had asked me what if I play sports or go to the gym. He asked me out on a drink date at a very cute and romantic bar in Greenwich Village. We were there for already an hour at this point. He appeared to be rather inexperienced at dates and quite sheltered due to his white-picketed fenced WASP family from either Connecticut or Vermont. I can’t remember. He was cute in a young endearing way but there was no chemistry and I wasn’t interested or attracted to him at all.
Oh no, a bobble head… Those were my first thoughts as I entered the restaurant and spotted Paulo sitting by the bar, sipping some wine. He was petit but with a large head and wild dark brown hair.
We met up on a weekday for dinner at a posh Italian restaurant in Flatiron. He was in New York on business for his winery; his family owns two beautiful vineyards in central Italy. I was toying with the idea of taking a trip to Italy at the time and thought I could get some tips from a local, plus I’m always open to meeting new people.
His bobble head wasn’t the complete turnoff however; it was his odd accent. You may think, shouldn’t the typical Italian accent be super attractive? Well, yes. But he didn’t have a typical Italian accent. His English was quite good actually—but he had an overly exaggerated American drawl that made me so uncomfortable. It was so intense that it almost sounded like a really bad Southern drawl. Coming from an Italian, that was too bizarre.
Tattoo model and I did not go on a date. We facetimed. And yes, we met on Tinder. And no we did not video-cam sex (you dirty little minds)!
Racially ambiguous, tattoo model had such a defining angular jaw-line but soft puppy like brown eyes with one the brightest and most gorgeous smiles with his perfect pearly whites. Damn, Papi was so hot! His tattoos gave him such a bad boy vibe. Who could resist? And when I say tattoos, I don’t just mean the chest or sleeves—which he obviously has according to his photos. But they don’t stop there. Tattoo Model has ink all the way down to his fingers and knuckles! Kind of like those gangs you see in movies. Not sure if he’s actually or was in a gang…regardless, damn, Papi was so hot!
I actually don’t know if he’s a real legit model or not. His profile said he was. But regardless, even if he wasn’t, he definitely could be one. At the minimum, he had enough followers on instagram to be an instagram tattoo model, if that’s even a thing.
I’ve been thinking a lot about Marcelo* lately. Perhaps because the Summer Olympics, which is in Rio this year and something that I have been obsessed with since I was four years old, is only a few months away; and I’ve been subconsciously drawn to things that are Brazilian.
Yes, Marcelo was Brazilian. Young. 20 at the time we met. He was taking a year off from studying engineering in Brazil to do a year of exchange program in photography at Parsons. Tall, free-spirited, very intellectual, with a head-full of reddish brown curls. He appeared much more mature for his age.
We played message tag for a couple months before I finally agreed to meet up with him. Even though he was incredibly cute and interesting, I was not so keen on the idea of going out on a date with someone who was 5 years younger than me. Nonetheless, I caved in. He was the first younger guy I have ever been out on a date with.
Considering that I went to a college known for being quirky and nerdy, and thus a nerd myself, I actually find nerdy guys quite adorable and attractive. But it is definitely not adorable and attractive when the nerdy date is argumentative and try to prove that he is smarter than you every 5 minutes during the date.
Hiro and I met at an ice cream shop in East Village, after I suggested that it would be a better place to meet as a first date instead of what he proposed—rock climbing. Even though I am Asian American myself, it has been awhile since I dated or been on dates with Asian men in recent years. So I was curious and a bit apprehensive.
In all honesty, I have met some very nice and interesting guys from Tinder. But every now and then, I do meet a Tinder Fuckboy. This was my Tinder Fuckboy for the day.
He unmatched me about 10 seconds after my response.